and the oscar for today's terrible parent goes to .......
me.
ever have days when you can barely keep it together?
or you wish you weren't the adult & didn't have to?
or you hear yourself talking & think shut up - with the verse '...even a fool when he keeps silent is considered wise ...' running through your head.
days when there isn't a battle you've won & the white flag of surrender seems to taunt you.
days when you send out the text message to him that says - 'im crying'
its different than the 'momma said there'd be days like this' days ...
those are the days when you don't ever change out of boxers & a tank top
when you keep stepping on cheerios
when you forget to put the bill out & miss the mail lady
when the diaper explodes
when what you were planning on fixing for dinner doesn't work 'cause you're missing the main ingredient
when the jehovah's witness ladies show up right at nap time & want to 'share' with you
when the hose gets turned on and not turned off
when even in the crazy moments of everything turned on its head you could still laugh ...
those are 'those days'
tHis day was ...
frustrating
hard
long
the kind when they come back to you & say 'i thought you were coming back to talk to us ....' ie - you had to leave for sanity & wisdom & space ... and forgot to come back
the kind that take too many brain cells to come up with something laughable
the kind where my boob kills 'cause the milk has let down hours from when baby will eat next & it just makes me grouchy and hurt & i think after 8 months, really ... why does it still do that!
frozen chocolate chips anyone?
: )
and then at lunch when we all had something different 'cause there wasn't enough left of one thing somehow it all turned around. when we thanked Jesus for forgiveness 'cause He'd been very generous with it during the morning .... attitudes started changing, smiles started showing up along with kind words & cheerful hearts.
the thunder cloud had past.
sure all the issues were still there - but at least we were coping.
two bits of advice i've learned from different godly people -
1. its ok to be just a bit vulnerable with your kids - its ok that they see you asking God for help
2. kids are resilient - in spite of the unwanted oscars we sometimes win - they get their grace & forgiveness from their heavenly Father, (whereas the sin & foolishness comes straight from us.)
rex saw the presidents motorcade today - for real life. guess he was speaking just down the road from the job ...
my solution to kids not closing the back door - locking it.
- - -
guess who's back?
yesterday she got reacquainted with some old things that have been in our garage since mom & dad moved ... we were in tears from laughing so hard. this is my graduation dress. one - yes i know its that bad. two - it still fits testifying to how huge i was as a senior in highschool. three - those shoulder pads, my goodness i could play tackle football in it!
good times.
ahh, lets move on : )
- - -
hail the conquering graduates!
chad had already given back his gown - he didn't have the greatest school spirit : ) but we were pretty proud of them.
- - -
some fun in the city before & after dinner -
yes, it was cold enough for a snowsuit for regan & yet i'm in flip flops : )
just missing amie ... well & all the other kids : )
dad got called the 'good lookin' white guy who must be a billionaire' by the side show break dance guys. we were dying ....
- - -
[blink] she is 8 months old!
one of her biggest accomplishments in the last month is sitting up on her own.
oh she is just that cute.
no amount of boo's or hi regan's got her to look up ....
- - -
time to get going .... we leave again tomorrow for the long memorial day weekend. jack is ready to get his bag packed.
holdfast is playing on the radio. great song. holdfast .... help is on the way. holdfast, He's come to save the day. what i've learned in my life ... one thing greater than my strife, is His grasp ... so hOldfast.
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